unsettling

I'm a receive-read-delete person when it comes to text messages. If the message is personal and sentimental then after reading, it will be directly saved in one of my folders. But this message I received a few weeks ago stayed in my inbox for quite some time. It says, it's tough when people start to leave you hanging' but it's even tougher to pretend that you don't mind.

Unsettling.Sad.And so true.

To pretend to be glad when inside you're wretched is distressing. To pretend that somebody can walk out of your life shamelessly and then show everybody that you don't mind is disturbing. How often do you need to lock yourself and cry until you're mentally and physically drained? How deep will you let this sword cut you down? Until when... until when can you breath freely in this sham life?
It's sad for the simplest reason that no one in this world deserves to be left behind... hanging... waiting in silence, in vain. It's sad plainly because some people don't even have the courtesy to say goodbye. Goodbye! Even if this single word will shatter your dreams and happiness, it's still better, so much better for you to hear farewell so that you can gather the pieces together and start with a positive hope in your life.
It's true that when someone you love starts to leave you hanging it will shake your faith not only to Him but also to yourself. You will start to question your self-worth, your ability to love and take care of a relationship. But you also have to remember that first and foremost you're responsibility is to yourself. What's good in waiting if there's no one to come? What's good in hanging if you can freely let go? Breath easily as you fall down to lessen the burden inside... Embrace the touch of everything that surrounds you to diminish the pain... And you'll never know, maybe someone, just another someone will catch you before reaching the ground.